Parents and Friends
If someone close to you comes out as lesbian, gay or bisexual, you may be unsure about how you feel about it or how to respond. It will probably take time to get used to the idea, especially if you weren't expecting it. It is important to let the person know that you still care about them, even if you don’t understand it all straight away.
Regardless of your initial thoughts or feelings, remember that just because someone identifies as lesbian, gay or bisexual doesn't make them any less of a friend or family member. Think about how you felt about them before they told you and ask yourself why this would change just because they are attracted to people of the same gender or both genders. It’s OK to let the person know that it might take you time to get used to the idea, but that you will do your best to support them. It’s also okay to ask questions, as this shows that you are taking them seriously. At the same time, try and be sensitive about how they are feeling – it’s not easy coming out to someone close to you. Many lesbian, gay and bisexual people are coming out at a younger age due to increased information and greater acceptance. If a friend or family member comes out at a young age, it can be easy to dismiss it as a phase. Most people who come out have put a lot of thought into it before telling someone, so it is important to take it seriously. Try and let the person explore their sexuality without trying to change or pressure them.
We'veve included a link to FFLAG website. This is the Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays in the United Kingdom. They can give you lots of useful information if your child or friend has just come out.
Be patient and try to remain calm. Remember that talking to everybody who is involved about how each individual feels is very important!
Please view these resources for further information (open in pdf)
Regardless of your initial thoughts or feelings, remember that just because someone identifies as lesbian, gay or bisexual doesn't make them any less of a friend or family member. Think about how you felt about them before they told you and ask yourself why this would change just because they are attracted to people of the same gender or both genders. It’s OK to let the person know that it might take you time to get used to the idea, but that you will do your best to support them. It’s also okay to ask questions, as this shows that you are taking them seriously. At the same time, try and be sensitive about how they are feeling – it’s not easy coming out to someone close to you. Many lesbian, gay and bisexual people are coming out at a younger age due to increased information and greater acceptance. If a friend or family member comes out at a young age, it can be easy to dismiss it as a phase. Most people who come out have put a lot of thought into it before telling someone, so it is important to take it seriously. Try and let the person explore their sexuality without trying to change or pressure them.
We'veve included a link to FFLAG website. This is the Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays in the United Kingdom. They can give you lots of useful information if your child or friend has just come out.
Be patient and try to remain calm. Remember that talking to everybody who is involved about how each individual feels is very important!
Please view these resources for further information (open in pdf)
So you think your child is gay | |
File Size: | 1474 kb |
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A guide for family and friends | |
File Size: | 401 kb |
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